I bought a Brondell bidet.
There’s a sentence I never thought I’d say.
My one regret? That I didn’t buy one sooner.
Invented in France in the 1600s, post chamber pot era, the bidet is not exactly a newcomer to the bathroom scene. For a variety of reasons which we would now consider ridiculous, however, western civilization decided to shun the bidet cleansing method. I think it’s safe to say that we now know bidets are not a form of birth control or a “symbol of sin” as once believed.
I’ve always liked the idea of bidets but was never a fan of the manual European styles with separate faucets and towels to pat yourself dry. But after experiencing an electronic, automatic version during a stay at the Royal Hawaiian in Oahu, I became an immediate bidet-convert.
Using the sleek remote on the wall, you could customize each experience, and the result was like having had a fresh shower followed by the relaxing sensation of a heated dryer. Going back to the manual toilet paper wiping method seemed like a step in the wrong direction.
Back home and researching my options, I finally decided on this one: The Brondell Swash SE600 Bidet Toilet.
But rather than immediately ordering it, I thought the purchase could wait, maybe buy it next year.
Then the coronavirus pandemic hit.
As toilet paper shortages became the norm, I decided it was time to take the plunge.
Why The Brondell Bidet?
First of all, the price of the Brondell Bidet Swash SE600 wasn’t astronomical. At $399.99, I could work this cost into my budget compared to the more expensive bidets I’ve seen on the market, which can cost thousands of dollars. Of course, the more expensive models like the ToTo Neorest are entire toilets, whereas the Brondell version I purchased is only the seat that you install onto an existing toilet.
Secondly, I loved the customizable settings, particularly the one-touch auto 2-minute cycle mode (which I use now frequently). But you can get as creative as you like with the settings to formulate your own ideal experience.
One feature that I didn’t think I would particularly enjoy but continues to surprise and delight is the heated seat. Imagine this scenario: It’s 5:00 in the morning, you’re sleepily making your way to the bathroom, and instead of a cold, ceramic jolt, you’re greeted with a relaxing heated seat to ease you into the day.
The water wash from the stainless-steel nozzle is also heated at the beginning but cools to a refreshing temperature by the close of the cycle. A warm air dryer follows with a quiet hum, and while I wouldn’t mind a bit more power in the drying process, it gets the job done.
And finally, the design of the bidet seat wasn’t hideous. It’s pretty sleek, actually. I even like the nightlight feature, which illuminates the bowl in a glowing blue (FYI: you can turn off this feature). While some might think I’ve installed a “space toilet” in the bathroom, if you’re not afraid to use it, you’re probably going to want one too.
Fun Fact: In a 2016 survey, Kohler found that 53% of Americans were “unwilling” to use a bidet.
Another design feature worth mentioning is the charcoal deodorizer, which is perfect because not only does it work well, but you’re not forced to buy chemical fragrances that sometimes only make things worse. The power-saving eco-mode is another nice touch from an environmental and cost-saving perspective.
Installation
The manufacturer said the bidet toilet seat installation was going to be easy, and for once, it actually was. The exact promise was, “with a few simple steps, it’s easy to self-install in under an hour––no plumbers necessary!” I am happy to report that the bidet was up and running in about 45 minutes, with no plumbers necessary.
Do note that the Brondell bidet toilet seat must plug into an electrical outlet and the power cord is only 3.5′. If you don’t have a nearby outlet, you’ll have to resort to using an extension cord or hire an electrician to install an electrical outlet for you.
How Much Toilet Paper Has The Brondell Bidet Saved?
Charmin conducted a survey revealing that the average U.S. citizen uses approximately fifty-seven toilet paper sheets per day, and a typical roll lasts around five days (WorldAtlas.com). From an environmental perspective, toilet paper production “wipes out 27,000 trees a day,” according to National Geographic Newsroom.
I had previously read that a bidet can help to cut your toilet paper usage by around 75%, but I’m reasonably sure the percentage is higher. I’ve estimated that my toilet paper reduction is more in the 85-90% range, helping to cut costs, reduce purchase frequency, while also lowering my environmental impact.
Final Thoughts
Humans have come a long way from cleaning ourselves with corncobs, sheep’s wool, or whatever else we could find lying around. I don’t even want to imagine what wiping yourself clean with a stone, seashell, or a coconut felt like.
But nothing too innovative has occurred in the toilet paper industry since the Scott brothers in 1890 decided to put the paper on a roll.
Over the years, Charmin capitalized on making it softer, and the tissue became thicker, more decorative, but at the end of the day, let’s face it––we’re still just wiping ourselves with paper. The Chinese were first recorded doing that in the 6th century (History.com). Isn’t it time we made a little progress?
To get something truly clean––clothing, dishes, floors, the human body––I think we can all agree that water is the necessary ingredient to get the job done.
